And How

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Woe is me...

I can't think of much right now that is more stressful than meal time. I realize that I'm not the first person to have to cross this bridge and I'll probably think fondly upon these days when I'm having to deal with more "big boy issues," but I am at my wit's end! Between Jude's utter destruction of any element of neatness in my kitchen and Penn's finickiness (that's putting it lightly...), I wonder if we will ever emerge to a season of life that doesn't require begging, threatening, and baths during and immediately following meals.

Here's the scoop. Penn eats nothing (okay, very little). I've seen birds that have bigger appetites than this kid! The only time we don't have to argue with him about eating is when we're having breakfast foods, some form of chicken (plain), bologna, hot dogs, fruit, or sweets. Oh yeah...celery. This boy eats celery. You know all the foods that they say all kids eat--like mac and cheese, spaghetti, french fries, peas and beans??? Mr. Firstborn won't touch any of these unless you force them into his mouth and then be prepared for it to come back up. I was trying to lose weight so I decided to eat portions of food that I would give to the children. Unfortunately, I have discovered that I would not survive on what Penn eats. Seriously. And don't even think about taking this boy to a restaurant to "try something new." He's as stubborn as his momma and it isn't going to happen.

Jude, on the other hand, is my "good eater." He'll literally eat almost anything I put in front of him. Well, I take that back. He'll try to eat anything I put in front of him, but at least half of it will end up on the floor, on his head, the walls, in his diaper...you get it. Then when he's starving all the time and we're wondering how he could possibly be hungry again, you remember that he only was able to get half the meal you offered him into his mouth. Poor guy. I know you're thinking, "Can't you just help him out and spoon-feed him a little?" Nope. Not only is Jude my "good eater," he's also "Mr. Independent." He'd sooner starve than let you help him--with anything. Give him a spoon and it may as well be a piece of jewelry, nice, but not necessary. Fisting food is much more efficient to him.

Therefore, after meals, you will usually find me near my breaking point. Wanna help? Got advice for either of these scenarios? Let me know. I'll be the one under the table threatening Penn if he doesn't eat something, while vacuuming cous-cous with ketchup up my arm.